Abuse Prevention Emphasis Day 2006

 

Resource Packet

 

 

 

Making the Church a Safe Place

 

 

 

written by

Bernie and Karen Holford

Family and Children’s Ministries Directors

South England Conference of Seventh-day Adventists

Trans-European Division

 

 

 

Prepared by the General Conference

Abuse Prevention Emphasis Day Committee

Adventist Chaplaincy Ministries

Adventist Review

Children’s Ministries

Education Department

Family Ministries

Health Ministries

Ministerial Association

Women’s Ministries

Youth Ministries


 

 

 

 

 

 

 

January 12, 2006

 

Dear Church Leaders:

 

Let me begin by thanking you for the part you will play in ensuring that this year’s Abuse Prevention Emphasis Day is successful and a blessing to all the members in your church.

 

Our theme for this year is “Making the Church a Safe Place.” Our emphasis is on ensuring that every member—whether young or old—will feel comfortable and safe in our churches. Our hope and prayer is that each member will know that the one place they will be accepted, loved and cared for unconditionally is the church.

 

In this packet you will find -

 

  • A Suggested Order of Service
  • Dramatic Scripture Reading
  • Sermon
  • Children’s Story and Handout
  • Two Adult Handouts
  • Seminar

 

Feel free to adapt the material to fit your local preferences. We ask that you include other departments in your church to promote and present this program. At the General Conference nine departments work together to prepare this material (as listed on the cover of this program) and we are all committed to helping the vulnerable, unprotected and those in pain—whether emotional or physical—in our church and the wider community.

 

Our prayers are with you and we know that God will bless you and your congregations as you worship on this day.

 

Love and joy,

 

 

 

Heather-Dawn Small

Director


A Suggested Order of Service

 

Prelude

 

Call to Worship: Seventh-day Adventist Hymnal 855

 

Invocation

 

Hymn of Praise: O Worship the King SDAH 83

 

Scripture Reading: Zechariah 7:9-14 either straight from the Bible or in a dramatized version as provided below.

 

Offering

 

Prayer for the offering and the pastoral prayer

 

Children’s Story: ‘Taking Care of Little People’ or ‘Egg Babies’

 

Special Music

 

Sermon: ‘The Power to Protect’

 

Hymn of Response:  Take my Life and Let it Be SDAH 330

 

Benediction

 

‘Sharing the Peace’ Blessing

(In a ‘Sharing the Peace’ Blessing members of the congregation move around shaking each other’s hands saying ‘May the peace of God be with you, and protect you’.)

 

Postlude

 

 

.


Scripture Reading - Zechariah 7:9-14, NIV

 

People required - Narrator, Voice of God from off stage, using a microphone, a group of at least three people to mime actions in chorus together

 

Narrator

This is what the Lord Almighty says,

 

Mime – all turn their heads and lean towards the direction of the voice of God, cupping a hand behind their ear.

 

Voice of God

Administer true justice, show mercy and compassion to one another. Do not oppress the widow or the fatherless, the alien or the poor. In your hearts do not think evil of each other.’

 

Narrator

But they refused to pay attention;

 

Mime – all turn their shaking heads away from God and then looking all over the place.

 

stubbornly they turned their backs and stopped their ears.

 

Mime – all turning their backs away from God and putting their fingers in their ears.

 

They made their hearts as hard as flint

Mime – bring both tight fists to knock together over the heart, (the fists need to form a kind of heart-shape as you do this to illustrate the hardness of heart concept))

 

and would not listen to the law or to the words that the Lord Almighty had sent by his Spirit through the earlier prophets.

 

Mime – put hands over ears and shake heads then pretend to fight and steal from each other.

 

So the Lord Almighty was very angry.

 

Mime – cower together in fear and tremble.

Voice of God

‘When I called they did not listen; so when they called, I would not listen, I scattered them with a whirlwind among the nations, where they were strangers.

 

Mime – act as if a whirlwind comes and scatters all the mime artists around the stage.

 

The land was left so desolate behind them that no-one could come or go. This is how they made the pleasant land desolate.’

 

Mime – lie on stage as if dead.

Narrator

Today, may we listen to the Word of God

 

Mime – stand up again alertly and listen carefully.

 

and be inspired to act justly,

 

Mime – shake hands with each other as if in agreement.

 

Mercifully,

 

Mime – one person gives gifts to others who look sad and poor.

 

and compassionately with each other,

 

Mime – all place both hands over hearts, crossing them slightly to make a heart shape, and then, keeping the hands in the heart shape – offer the ‘hand-hearts’ to each other, with compassionate and caring movements and facial expressions.

 

and so restore the pleasant land in which we desire to live.

 

Mime – looking around in wonder, being happy, and praising God.

 

In His Name, Amen.

 

           

 


Sermon

 

The Power to Protect

 

This sermon has been written so that it can be presented by one person, two people alternating parts, and taking the different characters in the three Bible story illustrations, or by seven people – the main preacher, and the characters of Boaz, Ruth, David, Mephibosheth, Joseph and Mary as they arise in the sermon. Use the amount of people and format that best suits your context and the team you have available to work with you.

 

Introduction

 

Recently there was a television program that invited people to create robotic style machines for different purposes. Some robots were designed to climb ropes as fast as possible. Some robots had to jump as high as they could. Some had to move as fast as possible in a straight line or lift a weight. But some of the most challenging to design were the robotic rockets that had to shoot as high as possible and then land safely again. The task sounded fairly easy, but there was an added challenge: each rocket had to transport an egg in such a way that the egg would not be broken, or even cracked, during the flight and landing.

 

All kinds of techniques were used to try and protect the egg from the force of the initial propelling explosion to the impact of the final landing. One egg was suspended in heavy oil. Others were wrapped in layers of wadding, or supported by polystyrene that had been shaped to fit the egg. Other rocketeers added parachutes to slow down the descent of the rocket and so protect the egg from the full impact of a landing. Some methods worked and others didn’t. Those that kept the egg intact had taken into consideration all the possible dangers and provided protection for every stage of the egg’s journey. The more types of protection used by the rocketeer, the more likely the egg was to survive the experience intact.

 

Eggs are fragile and vulnerable. Many of us have accidentally broken an egg and made a horrible mess.

 

People are fragile and vulnerable too:

 

·        They can be physically vulnerable when they are babies, children, sick, disabled, or elderly.

·        They can be emotionally fragile if they have been bereaved, or are suffering hardships, depression, disappointments and disease.

·        They can be spiritually fragile if they are new believers, are young in faith faith, or their life experiences are making it difficult for them to experience God’s grace.

·        They can also be socially and materially vulnerable if they are poor, lone parents, refugees, immigrants, students, unemployed, or find it difficult to work for a living wage that will support themselves and their families if they have them. Some people may find themselves forced to become sex workers in order to feed their families.

 

There are probably many ways in which people can be fragile or vulnerable at some time in their lives and we need to be aware of the needs around us so we can identify those who need extra protection and support.

 

God calls the stronger to support the weaker, the richer to support the poorer. He puts us together in the community of church so that we can bless each other as we give and receive from each other. God calls us to be a church community where every fragile person finds support and protection

 

Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this, to look after orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.

James 1:27 NKJV

 

The different words translated in our Bibles as being ‘oppressed’ have a range of meanings, such as being bruised, put down, broken, spoiled, destroyed, distressed, terrified, crushed, or worn down.

 

Boaz (The Book of Ruth)

 

When you are harvesting in your field, and you overlook a sheaf, do not go back to get it. Leave it for the alien, the fatherless and the widow, so that the Lord your God may bless you in all the work of your hands….Remember that you were slaves in Egypt. That is why I command you to do this. Deuteronomy 24:19, 22, NIV.

 

He who oppresses the poor shows contempt for their Maker, but whoever is kind to the needy honours God.

Proverbs 14:3, NIV.

 

As soon as I saw her I knew she was vulnerable. I had heard my servant girls talk about meeting her at the village well. Ruth was a widow, with no son to provide for her, and she was caring for her mother in law, Naomi, who was also a widow with no son to care for her. They were both without support and without protection. The two women had no income, and they had returned to Naomi’s village because it was the only place in the world where there was the possibility of a home and the chance that some distant relations would take pity on them.

 

But Ruth was also at risk because she was young and beautiful, a foreigner who could not command respect as a Jewish national. She was from a country that the Jews despised; a country who sacrificed their children to their ever-hungry gods.

 

Ruth and Naomi were hungry. They had returned to the village at harvest time and had no vegetables growing in their own gardens, no fields planted with golden grain. Ruth had to go out into the fields and gather up the loose grain stalks from the sun baked earth. She would be in the fields all day long with my young servant men. And I knew what they were like—strong and virile—and I knew that a beautiful, lonely, foreign woman, who had to glean from morning till night, could be at risk from their games, their temptations and their lust.

 

Ruth had many needs. She had shelter, and water from the village well, but she needed more than that. She needed to be free to gather food and make a living for herself and Naomi, so I ordered the men to leave a little extra grain where it would be easy for her to collect.

 

·        I told her to gather grain only in my fields, where I was the master.

·        I let my servants know that she was special and that no harm should come to her and that they should share their food and water with her.

·        I told her to glean with my female reapers, so that she would be safe, and have companionship.

 

And why did I do all this for a foreign young woman? Because I believe that my nation should be a shining example of God’s love for all the people who come to her for refuge from their own people and nations. I want to live out my faith in God, and His love for me, by creating a safe place for refugees, vulnerable women, and those who are poor and hungry.

 

I remember hearing my own mother, Rahab (Matthew 1:5), tell me the stories of how kind the Israelite community had been to her and how her gift of hospitality and generosity led to the protection and rescue of her whole family from the destruction of Jericho. She was a foreigner, but the Israelites took her in and gave her a home, a brand new life, and her self-respect. One way I can pass on the blessing given to my own mother, is to care for other vulnerable women in my community.

 

Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen: to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke, to set the oppressed free and break every yoke? Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter – when you see the naked, to clothe him and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?

Isaiah 58:6-7, NIV.

 

Ruth

 

I could not believe the kindness of Boaz. I came to Bethlehem poor, foreign and widowed, the lowest of the low, I thought, worthy only to scrabble for a few fallen grains behind the reapers. I was worried about how Naomi and would manage to live in her old and almost ruined home, with no means of support. The protection, care and support he showed me inspired others to support and protect me too. His servants shared their food with me and helped me to gather extra grain. And then he offered me the ultimate kindness and protection of becoming my redeemer kinsman and my husband. His compassionate heart extending to Naomi, protecting us both in the circle of his home and his family, giving us safety and hope where once there had been fear and despair.

 

Love always protects. 1 Corinthians 13:8, NIV.

 

David (2 Samuel 9)

 

It was a long time after Jonathan died before I remembered my promise to take care of his family. I made some enquiries and found his son, Mephibosheth. A childhood accident had left him permanently disabled and life had become hard for him. He didn’t feel very good about himself, describing himself as a “dead dog”. But I had loved his father and had the same compassion for Mephibosheth, his son. I felt bad that I had not been aware of the extent of his struggle, and that he had suffered for so many years when I could have been helping and supporting him. As soon as I could, I moved him into my palace where I could take care of him, protect him, and help him to lead a fulfilling life. I gave him back all the riches and land that his family owned and gave him servants to farm the land on his behalf.

 

This is what the Lord Almighty says, ‘Administer true justice, show mercy and compassion to one another. Do not oppress the widow or the fatherless, the alien or the poor. In your hearts do not think evil of each other.’

Zechariah 7:9,10, NIV.

 

We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves.

Romans 15:, NIV.

 

Mephibosheth

 

It was a complete surprise to me when King David summoned me to his palace. I must admit that I wondered whether it would be safe to see him, or whether he wanted to have me killed in case I was somehow a threat to his throne. I never expected what happened! It was a complete surprise to me when he invited me and my family to live in his palace, and when he gave back not only my father’s land, but also a manager and a workforce to farm it for me. Now I didn’t have to worry any more about how to provide for my wife and young son, or what kind of inheritance he would have. We had shelter, food, an income, and servants to take care of our needs and to run my errands.

 

A bruised reed he will not break and a smouldering wick he will not snuff out. In faithfulness he will bring forth justice.

Isaiah 42:3, NIV.

 

And we urge you, brothers…encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone.

1 Thessalonians 5:14, NIV.

 

Joseph

 

We were living quite comfortably in Bethlehem, Mary, baby Jesus and myself. The local townspeople had made us welcome, we had found a small house to live in, and I had enough carpentry jobs to provide for our needs. The shepherds who had visited us when Jesus was born would often pop by with some food, or wool for Mary to spin. We were ready to make Bethlehem our home for a while. Then we were visited by a group of exotic strangers, bearing extravagant gifts, and suddenly our world turned upside down. An angel visited my dreams and told me of the horror of Herod’s plans.

 

I woke Mary. We packed just the things we needed and fled through the night, down toward Egypt. It was a strange and foreign land, but far away from the power of our evil King. I was willing to sacrifice everything, to leave our home, my work and our friends, and to take just the things we could carry with us. I would do whatever it would take to keep our child safe. God had entrusted His child to my care, I was his earthly father, and I was passionate about protecting Him, not just because he was the Son of God. Would I not have done the same for my own child?

 

He looked for justice, but saw only bloodshed; for righteousness, but heard cries of distress.

Isaiah 5:7, NIV.

 

Mary

It was hard to leave everything that had just become home and a place where we had just begun to be accepted. But how could we stay in a place where our child would be put at risk, where people in places of responsibility were corrupt and had such a disregard for the preciousness of the life of a child? Later we heard of the full horror of Herod’s plan. Only a man with a heart of stone could conceive of such a nightmare. Our little children weren’t precious to him. He had no compassion on their innocence, no care for their safety or well-being. In the face of such cruelty we had to do whatever we could to protect our son.

 

At about the same time, the disciples came to Jesus asking, "Who gets the highest rank in God's kingdom?" For an answer Jesus called over a child, whom he stood in the middle of the room, and said, "I'm telling you, once and for all, that unless you return to square one and start over like children, you're not even going to get a look at the kingdom, let alone get in. Whoever becomes simple and elemental again, like this child, will rank high in God's kingdom. What's more, when you receive the childlike on my account, it's the same as receiving me.

    "But if you give them a hard time, bullying or taking advantage of their simple trust, you'll soon wish you hadn't. You'd be better off dropped in the middle of the lake with a millstone around your neck.”

Matthew 18:1-6, Message.

 

Jesus’ Example

 

·        Jesus came to show us how to respond to others in need.

·        He cared for those in His community who were oppressed.

·        He gave self-respect, forgiveness and hope to a woman caught in adultery.

·        He defended Mary, as she washed His feet with perfume and tears, when Judas began to verbally abuse her and put her down.

·        He dealt respectfully and gently with Samaritans and strangers. He touched the people others considered to be ‘unclean’.

·        He invited the children onto His lap and blessed them, when His disciples thought they were too little to be valuable. He defended the children vigorously, saying that if anyone should lead a child astray, it would be better for them to be dropped in a lake with a millstone around their neck. Strong words indeed.

·        He relieved hunger amongst the crowds that came to listen to Him on the hills, and rescued fishermen on lakes.

 

Everywhere He went His focus was to relieve suffering and oppression and set people free, rather than imprison them with fear and misery. (Luke 4:18,19.)

 

He did this because over and over again the gospels tell us that He was moved with compassion for the people. (Matthew 9:36; 14:14; 20:34; Mark 1:41; 5:19; 6:34 etc.)

 

Compassion comes when we step into God’s shoes for a while and look at the people around us through His eyes. His eyes are the loving eyes of a perfect Father, who is also perfect Love. When we stand in His place and look through His eyes, what will our response be?

 

Today, there are many people around us who are fragile or vulnerable, for all kinds of reasons. They are babies, children, young men and women, old men and women, people with disabilities, people with learning difficulties, refugees, people who have come to our country from other parts of the world, people who are poor or homeless. These people may be finding it hard to cope with life, they may be experiencing mental illness or distress, or they may be people who have been, and are still being, sexually, verbally, physically and spiritually abused. How would Jesus respond to them if He were walking through our country, our towns, our churches and our homes today? What would His compassionate heart move Him to do?

 

God calls us to wake up, to open our eyes to the suffering of others and be part of movement to protect those in our circle of care.

 

This is what the Lord Almighty says, ‘Administer true justice, show mercy and compassion to one another. Do not oppress the widow or the fatherless, the alien or the poor. In your hearts do not think evil of each other.’

Zechariah 7:9,10, NIV.

 

God calls us to remember that we are part of one body – His body – and we are to take care of every part of this body, because when one part hurts, every part suffers.

 

There are many parts, but one body. The eye cannot say to the hand, ‘I don’t need you!’ And the head cannot say to the feet, ‘I don’t need you!’ On the contrary, those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and the parts we think are less honourable we treat with special honour. And the parts that are unpresentable are treated with special modesty, while our presentable parts need no special treatment. But God has combined the members of the body and has given greater honour to the parts that lacked it, so that there should be no division in the body, but that its parts should have equal concern for each other. If one part suffers, every part suffers with it; if one part is honoured, every part rejoices with it.

1 Corinthians 12:20-26, NIV.

 

God calls us to bring to Him our indifferent, uncaring, unhearing hearts of stone, and to exchange them for a heart of flesh, filled with His vibrant and pulsating love for all mankind.

 

‘I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh.’

Ezekiel 11:19, NIV.

God calls us to offer compassion, support, help and protection. He calls us to be His comforting arms of love in a hurting world, His body to shield them from danger, His listening ears that are open to hear their stories of suffering, and to respond with caring actions and words, His voice that calls out for justice and mercy, and pleads for the little ones, the vulnerable ones, and the unprotected ones.

 

So what can we do as Christians, as church members, as living parts of the Body of Christ, as people with hearts of flesh? How can we offer them multiple kinds of protection, just as the best egg-rocketeers provided protection for every stage of the egg’s journey.

 

We can work to:

 

·        Recognise our God-given responsibility to care for those around us who are vulnerable.

·        Create a community where it is safe to talk about our struggles and our needs, especially our needs for protection and care.

·        Give the message that when people talk about their vulnerabilities, needs, or hopes for protection that they will be taken seriously and action will be taken, and, if children report their fears, or any abuse, they will be believed and taken seriously too.

·        Remember that every church is likely to have people who have been abused in the past, as well as those who may be being abused right now.

·        Enable each person to have a voice in the community, however small they are.

·        Listen to each other and respond to each other from the loving and compassionate heart of God.

·        Be willing to take appropriate action and to do something positive, practical and protective when necessary.

·        Be proactive and create a church community where people have good reasons to feel safe, by creating a building that doesn’t have spaces in which children might be abused. For example there needs to be windows in every door, closet spaces that are kept locked by responsible people, and careful stewarding of spaces during church activities.

·        Offer training to all members in child protection issues, advertise confidential caring services especially for children and vulnerable adults, and help people to know where to find good Christian counsellors if they need them.

·        Challenge the practices in our communities that disadvantage people or increase their vulnerability.

·        Recommend places where people can go for assistance or help if they need it.

 

And why do we need to do these things?

·        So we can follow Jesus’ example.

·        So we can be part of God’s plan for His community, and for His church.

·        Because of our personal relationship with God we become His touch to those who need His love and care.

·        Because this is a wise and loving way to live.

·        Because whatever you do to one of these vulnerable ones you are doing to God.

·        Because if we are not part of the protective process, we are part of the oppressive problem.

 

Andy’s dilemma

Andy was driving down a quiet country lane one afternoon when he noticed a car that had crashed into a tree. He stopped his car and ran over to the accident. The car had swerved to miss a deer that had run across the road. In the car Andy found a mother, who had been driving the car, trapped in her seat by the steering column. He called the emergency services, and then tried to see if he could help her. She was not badly injured and she was conscious, but she was unable to move. Andy tried to open her door and to see if he could release her, but it was soon obvious that this was the job for the emergency release team, who would probably not arrive for another twenty minutes as they were a long way from the nearest small town.

 

In the back of the car sat a girl, about four, safe in her car seat, but crying and miserable. Her mother had been reassuring her, but they had already been trapped in the car for almost an hour and the little girl was getting distressed and very thirsty. There was a bag with a drink in it strapped into the seat next to her, but she could not reach it, and her mother couldn’t help her.

 

Andy wondered what to do. He couldn’t help the mother, but he could help the little girl. He realized that he needed to reassure the mother and the daughter so that he wouldn’t add to their suffering and stress. He realized that he had the power to protect them both. He asked the mother if it would be alright for him to release the little girl from her car seat and to give her a drink. He promised to stay close to the mother and in her sight at all times. He gave the mother proof of his identity and wrote out his license plate number for her.

 

The mother agreed. She was glad that someone could help her take care of her little girl. Andy carefully released her and lifted her out of the car. He held her carefully, and stood as close to the mother as he could, so they could see each other. The mother smiled and the little girl squirmed in Andy’s strange arms. She wanted to go to her mother, but she couldn’t. She whimpered and struggled a little, then relaxed into Andy’s arms. He reached back into the car to find her juice, and a snack, and a familiar toy. Then he sat there, chatting to the mother and the little girl, reassuring them both, until the emergency services arrived, and a police woman was able to look after the little girl.

 

It was an unusual situation. Andy knew about the concerns a mother would have about a strange man cuddling a little girl, about the fear she might have had that he might abduct her child. But he had compassion in his heart – a ‘feeling with’ both the mother and the child, a desire to meet each of their needs and concerns. He tried to be as transparent as he could be, as reassuring as he could be, as careful as he could be. In the situation, with the mother unable to move and protect her own child, he had chosen to do what was best for them both.

 

If you were Andy what would you have done?

If you were the Mother, what would you have wanted someone to do for your child?

If you were the child, what would you have wanted someone to do for you?

 

Ultimately we have to stand before God and answer for our actions. Ultimately everything we do to or for a child or a vulnerable person, we have done to or for God Himself. Ultimately we have the power to bring peace and protection, defend the vulnerable and to work with God to chase away every terror from the earth.

 

The Lord is King for ever and ever…. You hear, O Lord, the desire of the afflicted; you encourage them, and you listen to their cry, defending the fatherless and the oppressed, in order that man, who is of the earth, may terrify no more.

Psalm 10:16-18


Children’s Story

 

Children’s story ideas

 

Taking Care of Little People

 

Have a parent bring a small baby or baby doll to the front of the church.

 

Introduce the baby to the children and tell them the baby’s name.

 

Ask the children what they think you need to do to take good care of a baby.

 

The baby needs:

 

·        Food and drink from its mommy or a bottle (show them a bottle of milk)

·        Clean, dry diapers (nappies) (show the children the things needed for changing a baby)

·        To be held carefully (show them how to hold the baby)

·        Warm clothes (show the children some baby clothes)

·        Cuddles and love (give the baby a hug)

·        Toys to play with so that they have some fun (show them some baby toys)

·        Gentle touch so it is not frightened or hurt (show the children how to touch the baby gently)

·        People to come and check when it cries

·        A safe bed to sleep in (show a travel cot if you have one)

 

Babies need lots of things to take care of them.

 

What do you need others do to help take care of you and to help you to feel safe?

 

When we take care of others we are showing them God’s love.

 

 

Egg babies

 

Give older children a raw egg to take care of for a week. They have to take it with them everywhere they go and bring it back to church the following Sabbath, safe and uncracked.

 

Invite them to write a journal each day about their adventures, or misadventures with the egg.

 

Offer a small prize for everyone who manages to bring their egg back intact the following Sabbath, after carrying it around with them all week.

 

Interview the children about what they learned from the experience of protecting their egg as a children’s story feature, or as a special feature in the service.

 

 

 

Children’s Handout